COVID Curfew Forces Woman Indoors Unless It’s to Walk a Dog, So She Puts Her Boyfriend on a Leash

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With much of the world locked down, normal living is tough goin’.

People’ve had to figure ways of having a life within considerable COVID confines.

That’s how you get things like a do-it-yourself treadmill:

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And to the north — in the same spirit of innovation that put a man’s bare feet on his dish-soaped floor and other men’s feet on the moon — a 24-year-old woman recently masterminded the means by which she and her partner might take a stroll.

In the Canadian province of Quebec, the Powers That Be aren’t pussyfootin’ around — they’ve instituted a curfew from 8 p.m. ’til 5 in the morning.

The only exception: If need be, residents can walk their dogs.

As reported by the Edmonton Journal, this gave the lady a doggone idea — she and her other half would enjoy the evening air without ending up hounded.

Unfortunately, what started out smoothly soon got ruff.

In the area of Sherbrooke Saturday night, around 9 p.m., police spotted a woman and a man steppin’ out.

There they were — sauntering along the sidewalk in the direction of downtown.

Officers pointed out the pair’s possible punishment — fines could eclipse $1,500.

That’s when the woman explained her innocence.

She was holding a leash, and on the other end…was her boyfriend.

Police Department Spokesperson Isabelle Gendron confirmed, “One of them had the other on a leash, and she said she was taking her dog, pointing to her partner, out on a walk, as allowed under the exceptions provided by Quebec’s premier under its curfew law.”

From the Journal:

Police tried to explain the true nature of the legislation, but the couple responded that it would be a “pleasure” to receive the fines and “it would not stop them from breaking the rules in the future and they would see how many tickets they could get,” Gendron said.

Their flagrance turned out to have fleas: Pet and owner were each ordered to fork over $1,546.

Tickets for $100 and $50 for breaking municipal regulations were also awarded.

And if the two continue to hike their legs in response to the rules, things could get hurriedly hairy: Citations run up to $6,000 for repeat offenders.

In its coverage, the Journal made clear it wasn’t pummeling anything as perverse:

With the benefit of hindsight — and without wishing to kink-shame — our guide to Quebec’s latest set of health measures should have clarified that the curfew exception allowing Quebecers to walk their pets within one kilometre of home only applied to non-human pets.

As for kinkiness, there’s also their daring age difference: He’s 40 — that’s 280 in dog years.

I’d say the guy’s robbing the cradle.

Either way, whatever their regard for Quebec’s curfew, surely there’s one ordinance to which they’ll adamantly adhere: Whenever the animal lover and her beastly buddy do their leashed lurking, I hope they at least ramble responsibly:

-ALEX

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